yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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