can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize