I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
