I can't watch pbs sober anymore
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I lost the right to judge tonight
Randomize
