How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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