I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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