You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
