I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
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Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
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if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize