Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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