I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
