I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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