gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I think I won the penis lottery.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Bring me that man meat
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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