Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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