I CAN MOONWALK!
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
