I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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