I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
These 23 Kids Have The Most Overbearing Parents Imaginable
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
21 People That Are Skilled At Illegal Activities
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....