I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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