what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
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They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
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I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck