just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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