It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
