Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
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