I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
