Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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