before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
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