Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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