Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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