how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
