I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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