i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
