Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
