Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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