Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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