How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
