you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
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