i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
