Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Your tits are I can't wait for
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
