THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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