I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Randomize
