Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Randomize