So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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