Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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