I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
