i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
