it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
