During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
