the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize