therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
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Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
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These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
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