I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
