oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
