no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
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he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
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is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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