I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
